The Unattended Pickle
Hello. My name is Yafhat Bazdid and let me tell you what happened to me today.
This day began when I went to the market place a little hungry. There, in front of me, an unattended pickle appeared. Looking around myself to see if anyone dropped this tasty pickle, I realized that no one was claiming it. I picked it up and took a bite. It was delicious! All of a sudden, the most frightening voice behind me screamed, “You ate my pickle! I will kill you!” Immediately, I regretted eating that scrumptious, tasty, delicious, juicy, wonderful unattended pickle.
What did I do next, you might be asking yourself. Well, I tore through the crowded market place as quickly as my chubby little legs could carry me all while arrows whizzed past my head. I feared for my life. I ran and ran for what seemed like hours and days, when in fact it was only ten short minutes. I headed out of town toward the desert. Suddenly, I fell face first into the sand. Spluttering and looking for what tripped me, I was shocked to to discover a bottle-nosed dolphin right in the middle of the desert! “What is THAT doing here?” I thought to myself.
“I will kill you for eating my pickle!!!” I heard from behind me. There he was, the nasty pickle vendor, along with the entire pickle brute squad only 100 yards away. They were racing to behead me, all for eating that scrumptious, tasty, delicious, juicy, wonderful unattended pickle.
“It was only a pickle!” I shouted back as I sprinted away from them as fast as I could. There was no time to question the absurdity of the dolphin in the desert.
Miraculously, as I looked to my right, a magical cave appeared. “I'm going in!” I muttered out loud.
I entered the cave and crossed my fingers that my pursuers would not locate me. My wish was granted as they quickly blasted past my little hiding spot. Checking my surroundings, I instantly thought of making a permanent hideout in this miraculous cave. There was a cool spring and a nice bed of moss. Who knew that such a cave existed in our hot, oppressive desert.
All of a sudden, a glint of gold caught my eye. “What's this?” I asked. “A lamp? A real genie lamp? Boy oh boy has my day improved immensely!” Sprinting to the lamp, I grasped it from its stand. I rubbed the side as I had seen in that Disney movie. You know, that one that has a princess and a villain and a talking animal sidekick.
A genuine genie materialized in front of me. Problem was though, this genie wasn't blueish-purple, it was a horrendous shade of blood red.
“Thank you,” this genie bellowed, “for releasing me from my jail. Three thousand years ago I was imprisoned by the Babylonian servant Abznar. And today, I have been released, BY YOU!”
The genie continued. “You must be expecting the usual three wishes like every other genie would offer.” He said this as if I've met other blood red genies in my life. He grumbled, “Well guess what, Bucko! Clearly, I'm different than most other genies. Look at me. I'm red. I have no desire to grant you three wishes. You're lucky I even let you live.”
I trembled in fear. This day had gotten even worse. And all because of that scrumptious, tasty, delicious, juicy, wonderful unattended pickle.
The genie was clearly aware of my fear. Strangely, he had a change of heart. “Since you freed me from 3,000 years of captivity,” he elaborated, “I suppose I could grant you one wish.”
“My one wish,” I hopelessly thought “would be to go back to the market and start this entire day over.”
“Consider it granted!” the genie quickly announced as he snapped his fingers.
Looking around I realized I was standing in the middle of the crowded market place a little hungry. “Oh look. There on the ground. An unattended pickle …..”